Davis Cup! Recap 3-7-17
Congrats to the Davis Cup for completing a successful Tuesday night, which featured the largest waiting list in Davis Cup history, and the most amount of long and grinding games. Many a league member were exhausted from playing their first game of the night. Apparently, no one in the league does any cardio outside of basketball, which is the right approach, since cardio sucks, but ball is life.
There was no Team of the Night, just a bunch of exhausted teams. Did any team win more than two in a row? I can’t remember. I’m still tired from yesterday. But there was a lot of game winning footage, provided by Yours Truly!
For you gambling fans out there, Commissioner Davis made his World Series prediction on Tuesday, choosing a Los Angeles vs Kansas City match up. Yes, folks, Royalties Dodging Davis could be seen sneakily putting a limited edition copy of the greatest novel ever
written by a Davis Cup member, into his gym bag before fleeing the premises.
Nick Yee is apparently the only Transformers Revenge of the Fallen fan out there. Nick went in for the rebound, but got his legs taken out from under him. He fell down hard but maintained possession. His shooting elbow was visibly bruised, but still he made his threes afterwards.
Future General Manager Alan Ng, for reasons unknown, subscribes to the Trust the Process strategy. I decided to limit my minutes and stopped play after four games, casually declining to play in the Last Last game. This resulted in me finishing the night with a 2-2 record. .500, baby! Hello, mediocrity! Trust the process!
The Safety Commission for the Davis Cup did not do its job last night. Someone who shall not be named volleyball spiked the ball and hit Paul Lee in the head. Paul shook things off and stayed in the ever dangerous Last Last game, and appeared to be ok. Unfortunately, Paul’s long term memory was affected, as he forgot to defend the three, the cardinal rule of the Davis Cup. The Safety Commission is now under independent review.
Rob Hodax’s love-hate relationship with layups continued last night as he blew an easy layup…made a tough one…made an easy one…made a tough one tougher by going for a reverse, which he missed…and then made an easy one.
John R Shotliff’s dreams finally came true last night, as he found a pre-game introduction handshake routine partner in Ron L Li
! Look for these two to star in their own YouTube video, coming soon!
The Man Up award goes to Pat Mak. After being mortally afraid of entering the paint last week, Pat put on his big boy pants and played center, nabbing a few steals and pulling down some critical rebounds while anchoring his team’s defense.
Team Rebound of the Night. Yours Truly does what Yours Truly always does, flys in for the offensive rebound… only this time I swooped in like Batman, scaring the other players, thus allowing teammate Nick Yee to grab the board unimpeded. Nick then dished it to Tin Hung for the easy layup. Teamwork!
Rounding out the usual league business…Hun Yi made a deep three. from the white line… John R Shotliff skipped into the lane for a mid range floater… Eddy Avetisyan powered through multiple hacks for a layup… Milhouse van Houten caught NBA Jam fire… Tin Hung fought off the cramps…Steve Stiffler set the toughest screen of the night…blah blah blah. Same old same old every time. You guys are all so predictable!
And finally it’s time for everyone’s new favorite section of the recap – Fundamentals vs Fun Dumbos!
Yours Truly makes his first appearance on the Fundmentals side, as I actually practiced a shot I should be taking in game, a mid range jumper. Props to Fundamentals alumni, Tin Hung, for suggesting the measure, and for rebounding. At the end of the night, The Suicide Squad of Commissioner Davis, John R Shotliff, Nick Yee, Rob Hodax, and Hun Yi decided to play knockout from the three point line. Way to run yourselves all into oblivion, people!